1989 I gave up all hope & by early 90s trying to meet other POZ, it just made me give up more because they all passed too fast, I completely gave up. I did wife/kid thing with a POZ lesbian, but because HIV was not tolerated in USA (was a HIV travel ban, wasn't even allowed to visit family) I lived there illegally. FInally I had something in my life to distract me, but I was deported and not allwoed back, so the hope thing is so hard to get back and I know I am tired of waiting to die like I did… read more

I have been through the worst of the AIDS crisis (early 90s POZ guys I met died as fast as I could meet), I have had rocks thrown at me in small towns to rid of me (stigma was rampant), I survived but feel guilty for living, I turned my back on POZ people in the 90s because I couldn't watch them die anymore, so much guilt over the years.

Now I feel no one gets me, guys I meet now have been POZ maybe 5 years, they don't get it. NEG guys get mad at me for giving my POZ blood brothers first dibs… read more

Got blood results from my HIV doc the other day and they were surprising. I guess we kind of take it for granted we will have an undetectable viral load not having one so many years. But when you do it kind of freaked me out. The weird thing is my CD 4 count was over 1,000. He is going to retake the test. Hopefully a glitch. But if not he will be changing my meds.

Anyone else have a detectable viral load or have one come and go? Just wondering?

Do I have to disclose my status even if I am undetectable and use protection.?

As per my last post thanks for all the great responses. I feel so much better I’m in the green zone. However lots of questions on what truly is undectable. So many different opinions even from doctors. We know the tests are getting more sensitive on viral load and soon I’m assuming that under 10 will be the new normal than the current under 20. With that being said does a 200 viral load considered to be worse then 100? Does under 20 mean better then 40? And So on and so on.or it’s all relative… read more

I’m so confused on what is considered undectable. First I hear 200 or under was considered undectable,then they came out with other sensitive tests that say under 50 is undectable. Now it’s under 20. What’s next another sensitive viral load test that measures under 10. So confusing. I’m at 40 am I considered undectable with a 657 cd 4 count? My doctor says I’m doing fine but that doesn’t answer the question any thoughts?

At first I thought this was it. But after I found this site I discovered lots of people who have been battling this disease. My name is ernest and this is my 6th year fighting. How about you???

A friend told me that he doubles up on his HIV meds on date night since he doesn't use condoms.
Any advice?

Asking for a friend