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Real members of myHIVteam have posted questions and answers that support our community guidelines, and should not be taken as medical advice. Looking for the latest medically reviewed content by doctors and experts? Visit our resource section.
A myHIVteam Member asked a question 💭
Brighton, England, United Kingdom

I recently posted a Question/Answer regarding a potential date.. After I disclosed my HIV Status, the guy went silent for a Week. I assumed he was scared off by the HIV issue, albeit that Ive been undetectable since 2004. However I heard from him today out of the blue. It appears he does want to get together at some point, and I'm wondering whether this is a good idea or not, given my fragile state of mind and health. Ive been single for 10 years now, and I wouldn't want to go through the… read more

October 26, 2025 (edited)
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A myHIVteam Member

I Think many of us share your perspective. We’re still human. Have feelings, doubts etc.

You told him, he reached out.
Maybe he did need to think about it. Songs own homework. Answer his own questions.
For you, you were probably ready for him to reach out immediately.

I say go for it. Why discount the relationship ahead of time, and already hurt yourself.
At least give it a try. You may not like him, 🤷‍♀️

Better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all.

I graduated to a new level of acceptance and told a new friend about my status.

She’s the first person I have verbally ever told.

October 26, 2025
A myHIVteam Member

The guy in question has been video calling me on whattsapp. He told me his previous partner was also HIV+. It seems he wants to start dating me, after a week of silence, however he lives in Ipswich, a Town around 170 miles away. I'll probably visit him once I get my hot water plumbing problem resolved.

October 28, 2025
A myHIVteam Member

I'd meet up and take it slow. Get to know each other, but you will never know unless you step out of your shell. The hard part is out of the way and with PrEP and other medical advances hopefully HIV can just be a talking point and the fun can begin after that. You are a good looking catch someone will notice and maybe it's him.

October 27, 2025
A myHIVteam Member

I understand your fragile state of mind Mark. But if you can give yourself a break and just enjoy the date. It's not marriage it's not a commitment it's a date. Perhaps make some plans on doing something fun with each other that does not involve sex and learn to like each other at the start.

October 26, 2025 (edited)
A myHIVteam Member

I would definitely proceed. He may have needed time to process the information. Or he could have been just busy. There’s nothing wrong with meeting a person for coffee and a light meal. The conversation the two of you will have could possibly lead to friendship or a dead end. Take that chance

October 26, 2025

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