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Real members of myHIVteam have posted questions and answers that support our community guidelines, and should not be taken as medical advice. Looking for the latest medically reviewed content by doctors and experts? Visit our resource section.

Do you ever feel like you’re living two different lives—the one the world sees and the one you’re actually living?

A myHIVteam Member asked a question 💭
Edmore, MI

If you feel comfortable, share a 'behind-the-scenes' truth about your day that would probably surprise the people who only see your 'public' face.

April 25
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Reactions
A myHIVteam Member

Like "Eleanor Rigby" keeping a face in a jar by the door, I was always afraid I would grab the wrong face as I was going out. So lie Barbara Hunter says here I am take me or leave me

May 3
A myHIVteam Member

The face they see is the face they get !

If they do not like the real me they can look in another direction because I am not going to change to please others !

April 26
A myHIVteam Member

Yea I don’t like either one lol

April 27
A myHIVteam Member

Iam not sure at times but I know iam me take it or leave it

April 26
myHIVteam

So many people living with HIV know exactly what this feels like — that gap between the face you show the world and what's really going on behind closed doors. You're definitely not alone in this.

A myHIVteam member described it perfectly: their public self is outgoing and dynamic, while privately they're quiet, reserved Show Full Answer

So many people living with HIV know exactly what this feels like — that gap between the face you show the world and what's really going on behind closed doors. You're definitely not alone in this.

A myHIVteam member described it perfectly: their public self is outgoing and dynamic, while privately they're quiet, reserved, and introspective. Another myHIVteam member shared that it took 22 years to finally feel like the same person in both spaces. The divide often comes from navigating who knows your status and who doesn't. That constant mental calculation — *do I tell this person or not?* — can be exhausting in ways that are completely invisible to others.

It's worth knowing that this experience can take a real toll on mental health. Depression and anxiety are more common among people living with HIV, and carrying a private self that the world doesn't see is a big part of why.

Talking to a therapist, a trusted person in your life, or others who truly *get it* can make a real difference. You deserve to feel whole — not split in two. 💙

April 25

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