Your question simply took my breath away. I’ve never been asked a question like that before, I have lived almost half my life with HIV. The diagnosis came as a complete shock as I remember the labs being re-run 5 times. I was always tested regularly and I was always negative. I was healthy and life was busy, so I guess my coping mechanism was to bury it in the back of my mind and not dwell on it. I did not choose to go on medication right away as the side effects were so chronic in those days. I did go on Bactrim as a prophylactic to guard against PCP.
I waited until my numbers dipped and then I had no other choice, but during that time, something miraculous happened in spite of being labeled with a moniker that I simply detest albeit + or HIV/AIDS, I found love and love found me. A relationship that would span decades started a magical journey, new homes, travel, family, crazy happy careers and getting married all with an overwhelming sense of joy. But one day that all changed. I always thought that I would be the one, but when cancer knocked at the front door it didn’t ask for me it asked for my negative partner. So began a marathon that rarely gave pause with the exception of an occasional movie to distract us from reality. Our big careers got rather small…what was complex became simple…but what grew out of all that pain was a love I’d never known. 18 months later I put him to sleep. Shock and sadness greeted me daily like an old familiar coat. What ensued was a family silence that spoke volumes…really never wanting to admit what it really said. The wonderful memories of friendships evaporated into thin air. Never to be found again. The bandaid that once helped me feel safe was ripped away. There are at times thoughts of conversations to be had, or hugs to be given…but they are just that thoughts. I have my dog and he has me, he is my shadow and I his. Every morning we have a meet and greet..I ask him how he slept, if he would give me a hug or if he’d like a kiss. I find great joy in our friendship. And I still love…in my own special way. You don’t have to look very far to see that monikers are left to one’s interpretation, gay, straight, trans, + or - and while the may have been intended to help they most times they hurt. I keep my status to myself. You could call me a liar if was was to try and fool you into thinking I am not lonely. I am young at heart and old in spirit. I’m med compliant. I remain undetectable. Not to be confused with bulletproof but wisely remind myself that things haven’t changed all that much.

@A myHIVteam Member 25, I'm 69, became HIV in 2000, and only in the past 2 years has the HIV become a serious problem for me, despite the ART and being undetectable. Insomnia began in 2007 and continues. A more recent and additional problem for me is peripheral neuropathy - prickling at nerve endings all over the surface of my body. I'm trying all sorts of things to get rid of it.

I've discovered that lots of survivors my age have the same HIV-associated health problems as me.

Healthwise it seems you are fortunate. Long may that be the case for you! I hope you will improve your social situation while your health remains good.

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A myHIVte...

66yrs I am not gay I’m a straight woman I want the same a partner forever lasting got to be on there toes
No Scammers

Love your story stay strong

So you mean everyone here is a gay ,,,for us we are looking for men who are straight and we want to get married and have a happy family.