Connect with others who understand.

  • Learn from expert-reviewed resources
  • Real advice from people who’ve been there
  • People who understand what you’re going through
Sign Up Log In
Powered By
Real members of myHIVteam have posted questions and answers that support our community guidelines, and should not be taken as medical advice. Looking for the latest medically reviewed content by doctors and experts? Visit our resource section.

Do You Remember The Good Times More, Or The Bad Times More?

A myHIVteam Member asked a question 💭
Sierra Vista, AZ

I know I have been a good guy countless times, not that I can give a single example now. 🤠. But, I can remember the handful of times I was the bad guy like it was yesterday. Is that the norm?

January 27, 2024 (edited)
 · 
Reactions

Answer Summary

Members connected over the universal struggle of remembering mistakes more vividly than good deeds, with many sharing how negative memories... Read more

Members connected over the universal struggle of remembering mistakes more vividly than good deeds, with many sharing how negative memories can loop endlessly or surface unexpectedly, sometimes causing physical reactions like wincing. Several members offered strategies for managing these harsh self-judgments, including nightly gratitude lists, viewing intrusive thoughts as leaves floating down a river to be released rather than chased, practicing self-compassion by treating yourself as you would a loved one, and reframing past mistakes as learning opportunities rather than scorecards. A recurring theme was the importance of accepting imperfection as part of being human, focusing on growth over perfection, and intentionally celebrating successes to balance out the weight of regrets.

A myHIVteam Member

I miss the good times, but I tend to focus more on what is coming in the future.

February 7, 2024
A myHIVteam Member

I think we remember peaks and valleys more than we remember the "in-betweens". I know that I tend to remember successes and failures more clearly than other things. I try to consider what I have learned from the failures when those memories pop up and celebrate the successes as much as possible. At the end of the day, I am frequently heard saying ... "Perfection is a Goal not a Reality" :)

January 29, 2024
A myHIVteam Member

@A myHIVteam Member I’ve learned to accept the extreme passing thoughts. It’s like watching a river flowing by. Thoughts go by like leaves. If something unsavory passes by, I try to look away and let it float by. No need to swim after it. That’s my personal little mind game. 😊

January 28, 2024
A myHIVteam Member

We are sooooo hard on ourselves when if it was someone we loved we'd give them more of a break. We are humans and not perfect ...and to what standard are we holding ourselves up to? Tomorrow is another day! Don't keep score

January 27, 2024
A myHIVteam Member

@A myHIVteam Member. @A myHIVteam Member.

https://youtu.be/8_NzZvdsbWI?si=C8x7Hwqlgrr7ALPq

February 13, 2024

Related content

View All

Does Anyone Here Find That As You Get Older, Over 55, That You Tend To Masturbate More?

A myHIVteam Member asked a question 💭
Hagerstown, Maryland USA

Do You Think There’s Been Progress For Treating Hiv

A myHIVteam Member asked a question 💭
New Brunswick, NJ

What Do You Want For Christmas 🎁

A myHIVteam Member asked a question 💭
Geneva, IL