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Dateing? And Disclosure?
A myHIVteam Member asked a question 💭

I am Tired of being Single and decided not to date Anyone unless I disclose my Status. Is it hard for anyone else when it comes to Dateing & Discloser! My entire family knows but I never yet had to disclose because I've just been single

posted July 8, 2017 (edited)
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A myHIVteam Member

Absolutely! But it's a must! I have a motto "it's not what you say but how you say it" timing is important also. But there is someone for everyone . Don't get discouraged if someone rejects or steps away, because just like it scared the crap out of us when we were told we were positive...those that aren't educated are REALLY SCARED, don't lose hope. Im married and my spouse is not positive.

posted July 18, 2017
A myHIVteam Member

When you meet someone that you really like and he likes you it will be easy,,, You willl work it out if you are positive and he is negative. We have been doing it for 28+ years.....

posted July 15, 2017
A myHIVteam Member

I’ve been in a +/- relationship for going on 9 years, I told him on the first date. (Knew him from my job for a bit before our date) After dinner he asked if I wanted to go back to his place for a little while and I knew at that very moment if I said yes I’d have to disclose to someone besides my family for the first time ever! After a few minutes I said “f**k it” and went to his place. As soon as we got there I broke it down for him and gave him the option to take me home then and there without hard feelings to which he replied, “well, I’m sure there’s a safe way for us to still fool around, I’m sure people do it all the time, we just need to get creative!” And that we did until I had the time to educate him properly…. That was 8+ years ago, we now have a wonderful life together, a 4 year old daughter, and an amazing sex life. He’s on Truvada, I’m undetectable, and we see our ID spec regularly. He knows there’s always a chance things could change with my health and neg. status and for that we get blood work done regularly and keep condoms on hand just in case. I really feel educating people about the facts and finding open minded individuals is key. I know my situation isn’t typical and that I got really lucky finding this amazing man to spend my life with. But they are out there! They do exist!

posted November 4, 2021
A myHIVteam Member

I've not been with a woman in over 15 years because of it. I need to find a woman with the same condition who I can be open and honest with and not feel ashamed or rejected. I've tried on several occasions to find a good woman and as soon as I tell them they disappear and dump me like a piece of trash. It is the hardest part of my condition to deal with daily sometimes wishing I was dead instead. I'm undetectable and have been since the beginning and with all the new data pointing to a normal life but ignorance and fear rule people's lives

posted May 24, 2019
A myHIVteam Member

I agreed that you should keep it secret for the first date. For the second date, you should tell your partner. If it is acceptable, your relationship can move on. It's not always the case that HIVers have to date with HIVers.

posted July 14, 2017

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