Do You Feel Your Social Life Has Been Affected Greatly Having HIV? | myHIVteam

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Do You Feel Your Social Life Has Been Affected Greatly Having HIV?
A myHIVteam Member asked a question 💭

In the 80's and 90's in the absence of effective antiretroviral therapy, is was often thought that one with HIV suffers a social death prior to the actual physical one. As a long termer I saw this happen over and over with my friends who were sick, friends wouldn't come around much, and sometimes family would take no interest except in the estate once one dies. And friends or family falling away expecting you to be more available when you just don't feel good. I'm not sure we suffer as much… read more

posted June 5, 2022
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A myHIVteam Member

Immediately after diagnosis, I discovered poz social groups in my city - Chicago at the time - that met for a weekly happy hour. This group wasn't a 'support' group that sits around in a circle comparing sad stories - instead, it was definitely about hanging out, laughing and having fun. And in those contexts, I found the group to offer all kinds of uplifting support. Since these online apps have become more prevalent, the poz social groups aren't as prevalent as once upon a time - which I find unfortunate - especially for the newly diagnosed. As such, I notice a big void in absence of those local poz social groups. I wish they would return - since I am more into face-to-face meetings - than in online txt messages. I am able to easily travel anywhere in the world to better forge substantive connections with quality people - and likewise would enjoy establishing friendships with others with the same ability. There really just is no substitute for in-person connection - IMO.

posted September 3, 2022
A myHIVteam Member

I see the stigma the doctor assured me that I would be ok once on meds so I wasn't that worried about dieing once I talk counselors at the clinic that had been poz for 20 plus years healthy but the stigma was the biggest worry I keep it to myself haven't so I don't have to face it but the people in my fri group some who work in healthcare constantly ssy inaccurate things I want to speak up but I don't want them to suspect but it definitely angers me to my core the false outdated info health care workers themselves spread

posted June 5, 2022
A myHIVteam Member

@A myHIVteam Member,

Yes, I saw the same thing with friends and family. I didn't do that when I was hiv negative. I embraced them. In those days, I hadn't even faced being transgender or even said the word. I learned to embrace the "humanity" of people and not the disease. Much like Louise Hays attitude toward giving gay men,living with Aids in Los Angeles, Hay Rides for amusement.

It was always in the back of my mind, what does the social isolation look like for other communities, living with HIV, not just gays. The straight, the bisexual, the transgender, the lesbian, the pansexual, the asexual, the polyamorous.

As a Proud Transgender Woman, I feel socially isolated each and every day. It is going slowly but at least, we are not as much in the shadows unless your from states that don't see our value as legitimate human being.

I find comfort going to the gym and going out in public spaces. Since I live in California now, it's a much more accepting place, than my previous home state of North Carolina.

Finding my space has been a challenge, even among "some" well meaning gay men folk, say they support us but don't show it. With that said, I lived with more privilege and acceptance as a gay man, than that as a transgender woman.

I have probably rambled on and my apologies.

Best,

Cynthia

posted June 5, 2022
A myHIVteam Member

No not all know my status I keep it too myself so I'm good ☺️

posted June 5, 2022
A myHIVteam Member

For me nobody knows that im HIV positive so they treat me the same way

posted June 5, 2022 (edited)

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