What Is Everyones Thoughts On Pressing Charges Against Someone That Gave You HIV When They Knew They Had It? | myHIVteam

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What Is Everyones Thoughts On Pressing Charges Against Someone That Gave You HIV When They Knew They Had It?
A myHIVteam Member asked a question 💭

I'm in Virginia and even tho we have both options of a felony and misdemeanor, most will only be convicted of the misdemeanor. The difference is actually intending to infect someone vs "failing to mention" that you have it. The detective told me most likely it will be reduced to a misdemeanor. SERIOUSLY?!?! That son of a bitch "failed to mention" it EVERY DAY for over 3 months! If that's not intentional, I don't know what is! Some people say it targets hispanic, black or LGBTQ people, but it… read more

posted July 29, 2021 (edited)
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A myHIVteam Member

Hi my dear it's me again. You said something that struck a chord with me this morning as I drink my coffee. I was with an ex for 12 years. We had sex everyday 3 to 4 times a day for 12 years until he was diagnosed with AIDS. He told me he was okay he told me he was fine but that's not what the doctor told me. Was I angry absolutely did we break up absolutely did it take me some time to recover absolutely. But it wasn't until one day I ran into him on 42nd Street in Manhattan , New York City.... standing in front of me on a line inside a pharmacy .....that I realized ...I was no longer upset.... I was just indifferent. It took me 10 years to let the angerr go and it took me that long to find love again... and you will too ❤️❤️❤️❤️🤗🙏👍

posted August 4, 2021 (edited)
A myHIVteam Member

I asked the guy that I got HIV from if he had been tested and he said yes. I didn't ask what the results were. I lived in anger for awhile but someone told me that it was like swallowing poison and expecting THEM to die. It doesn't hurt them, only me. It took allot of work with a therapist and admitting that I didn't protect myself (this is in my case honey) even though I was with him for 2 years for me to forgive him. I didn't do it for him. I did it for me, not because I condone what he did or forget it.

posted July 31, 2021
A myHIVteam Member

If someone is positive and NOT on medications to treat it and they are not undetectable and fails to mention anything then, yes I agree that it is a major problem and they should have said something to prevent the spread of HIV.

If they have taken medication for several years (like me) and are undetectable or nontransferable then the chances of them passing it are "impossible" and they no longer need to mention that they are HIV Pos/ undetectable and no longer required by law to share their medical status if they don't want to. Again this is only if they can prove their CD4 count is higher for their immune system and their viral load is at the undetectable point and they can't give it to anyone. I would be upset if someone didn't tell me they had an STD while I have HIV because my Immune system is more likely to be affected by it. The same for someone that is Positive for HIV and not taking medication to treat it. They should take responsibility to care for their medical needs before becoming intimate with someone and potentially passing HIV to someone unawares or unintentionally.

posted July 30, 2021
A myHIVteam Member

My dear I understand your anger. Know that there are a lot of us online. People come from all parts of the world. We have all one thing in common. We all have HIV. Despite the way we got it, we have it. I'd say... let the past go forgive yourself first forgive him and then move on and have the best life you can dream possible and create a new one for yourself 😊😊😊😊😊❤️🌈🙏

posted July 30, 2021
A myHIVteam Member

@lotusnmurkywayers its all in the hands of the detective and commonwealths attorney now. I just have a feeling that theyre gonna bs it away. So far my county has failed on other things. They refused to extend my protective order, then i happened to see on arrests.org that he had a protective order against him back in 2016 and he violated it FIVE TIMES IN THREE MONTHS!!!! Hes obviously crazy! They don't want to take anything serious until someone ends up hurt or dead. I carry my gun with me everywhere i go. And in looking for a new job, im applying out of Richmond so i can sell my house and move. Its definitely taking a toll on me, but someond has to stop him (or at least try)

posted August 3, 2021

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